When you first get to Japan and everything is new, you’ll meet a lot of people who will speak English to you. Some of them will be well traveled and really good English speakers. For others, you may be the first non-Japanese person they’ve ever spoken to. They don’t realize what questions are good to ask you and what questions are annoying.Every foreign person in Japan gets questions about whether or not they can eat natto, raw fish, and, “Can you use chopsticks?” or even worse (depending on if it's actually true or not) “You’re really good at using chopsticks!” [おはし上手ですね!]. Maybe the worst English phrase ever taught to Japanese people is, “Do you know ________?” because it just sounds 100% patronizing and will alienate people. Asking someone, “Do you know Hiroshima?” or “Do you know Japanese sushi?” in English comes across as, “I think you’re an idiot who has never heard of the Second World War” or, “I think you’re probably a culturally uneducated hick who lives off McDonalds hamburgers” even though it is an innocent nuance mistake. Instead of saying, “Do you know____” they can say, “Have you ever tried / been to _____.” It’s an innocent nuance mistake.
Another thing to stay away from is asking where someone is from and then blurting out the most common stereotype from that country when you get the answer. I wish I got money every time people just shout, “Avril Lavigne! Maple Syrup! Vancouver Olympics! Celine Dion! Snow!” at me when they hear where I’m from. (Sweden: IKEA! France: ZIDANE! Etc etc etc) But if you actually do know a lot about that country and you have an idea of what that person’s interests are, a Japanese person can make a foreign person into a good friend by blurting out the right word. For instance, one of the people I met in Matsue just read a book about Terry Fox and knew more about the guy than I do. He went on to tell the whole group the story of Terry Fox and I actually felt really happy about that. Other great things to shout at me when I tell you where I’m from are Leonard Cohen, Neil Young, Pierre Trudeau or anything about lakes/nature.
Everyone knows the questions not to ask foreign people in Japan, but what are some good questions to ask foreign people in Japan? I’m trying to think of some good ones. These are the ones I’ve come up with.
"Where is your favorite place in Japan?" (It’s a super common question, but open-ended, constantly changing and never tiring.)
"Are you more interested in the traditional the aspects of Japan (temples, shrines, Ikebana）or the modern aspects (manga, architecture, fashion, ECT)?"
When you hear what sort of Japan they are into, you can tailor the conversation to their interests. For example, starting a conversation about manga or Jpop with me will get you nowhere, but I could happily hear recommendations about good hot springs, Japanese literature/ art/ (good) music or camping places for ages.
"What is your favorite Japanese food?”
“Is there any kind of Japanese food that you hate?"
“You’ve tried _______, right?”
Instead of saying, “Do you know Japanese Okonomiyaki?” try asking it as though you assume they already know it. Then, if they don’t know it, you can be like, “Oh, you have to try it! It’s so good. Okonomiyaki is like this savory pancake popular in Kansai and all over Japan. I know a really great restaurant and I’ll take you there sometime if you want. It’s one of Japan’s main comfort foods”
“Can you sing Japanese songs at Karaoke? What song do you sing?”
This would probably work on anyone but me. I feel like I’m the only person who doesn’t like Karaoke in Japan.
"Do you like any Japanese music? If you tell me what genres you like, maybe I could recommend a good band/artist for you."
Only do this if you both actually do like music. Only do this if you are not going to recommend something like Mr. Children, Ayumi Hamasaki or Kinki Kids.
“Do you have Onsen in your country?”
Some countries have hot springs and others don’t. The ones they have are often a lot different than Japanese ones, too. For example, you have to wear a bathing suit in commercial hot springs in Canada, but if you like hiking and know the right people (with 4 wheel drive vehicles and great direction sense) you can find natural hot springs in Canada that are like gorgeous, snowy meadows of paradise and your group will be the only people there.
“Did you start learning Japanese before you came to Japan?”
“Are there many Japanese people in your country?”
Shock foreign people with an interesting statement they may never have heard before, like, “Do you know that most Japanese people have eaten raw horse meat served in thin slices like Sashimi?” (That’s true. It’s called Sakura, Sakuraniku, Basashi, Baniku, Bagushi. If you have a sentimental spot for Black Beauty, you might want to write those names down before you go to Japan.)
Foreign people in Japan usually like studio Ghibli movies. I have almost zero interest in anime, but even I can talk about Ghibli if I’m asked. Ask what their favorite one is, and why. Remember to look up the English names because nobody knows what Sen to Chihiro is in English but everyone knows Spirited Away.
Foreign people in Japan usually like Haruki Murakami. You can talk about his books if you like them. The ones who like him are jealous that you get to read 1Q84 before they do.
What are some good questions you've been asked?
What are some annoying questions you've been asked?
